Phillipians 4:6 says “Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God.”
Whether you have 8 weeks or 18 months until you say “I Do” you may currently find yourself getting overwhelmed. If so, let me say this plainly, YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Having been engaged for a year this Sun, I’ve been there and even as I write this I may have obstacles yet to overcome. However, I want you to pause for a minute and meditate on the scripture above. Take a deep breath and remind yourself that you don’t have to succomb to the madness. You can delight yourself in the Lord and receive His peace.
Even if you’ve planned your wedding in your mind since the age of 6, nothing compares to the actual task of planning a wedding. There are so many details to consider, so many decisions to make, so many people to accommodate, so many pieces to the puzzle… It can honestly become stressful. You may find yourself disagreeing with your fiancé or having an all out fight. The ideas of family and friends may sometimes drown out your own voice, not to mention the task of blending two families and two sets of expectations. Opinions, however well intentioned, may hurt your feelings and sabatouge your self-esteem. Lastly, you and your fiance will no doubt frequently consider running away from everyone to elope. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing so, please be sure it is your genuine desire and not a reaction to the stress of your engagement.
So how can you defeat or avoid overwhelm and manage to make your engagement a time of joy? First things first, you must remember why you said yes. The goal is for both of you to use this season of engagement to receive wise counsel and allow God to uncover, discover, correct, or re-direct. Believing you’ve found the one is not enough. This belief must be confirmed and your profession of love must be proven. I promise you that your love will be tested. However, use those unexpected challenges and hurdles to strengthen your love for each other and forge an unbreakable bond.
There will be those whose comments about the institution of marriage make you second guess your decision to committ. Those who tell you you’re losing your freedom or wasting your time since 50% of marriages fail. There will be those who are jealous (both openly and privately) and their lack of support and their absence during this season may hurt, but stay focused. Let your love for God and your love for each other be your motivation, not the desire to stunt on “haters”. After all, we’ve all been jealous of someone currently in a season we wish to enter. Maintain an attitude of grace and humility. Use this time to beautify your spirit and your appearance. Be like Esther and pamper yourself as you prepare for your king. Seek the Lord for wisdom on how to properly love your Groom. Ask God to reveal the purpose of your union and how it will impact the Kingdom.
It is my prayer that as you transition from girlfriend to fiance to wife that you will do so with grace and discernment. Refuse to be a bridezilla and an ego maniac. Contrary to popular belief it is not “all about the bride”, it’s about the couple. Lay a strong foundation during your engagement built on love, trust, honesty, and integrity. Do this and I promise you’ll be your own #RelationshipGoals !